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How Do I Know God Exists?

This post was inspired by the new “I Believe” study available now on the IF:Gathering app.

We believe in one God, the Father, the Almighty, maker of heaven and earth, of all that is, seen and unseen. {The Nicene Creed}

How do I know God exists? Because He has made himself known to me over and over again in subtle and more blatant answers to prayer over the last 15 years since I became a follower of Jesus.

How do I know God exists? Because He has made himself known to me over and over again in subtle and more blatant answers to prayer over the last 15 years since I became a follower of Jesus.

When I was 30, I cried out to Him and asked Him to show me He is real so that I might believe. He revealed himself to me and walked me through those early, tremulous steps of my faith.

When I was 32, I begged Him to heal my heart from a painful break up and show me how to function in the world apart from my desperate desire for the love of a man and a lasting relationship. He led me to a recovery program at my church, which He used to begin healing me from years of heartache over broken relationships and unhealthy choices regarding men and intimacy.

At 33, I confessed to Him a massive list of past and present sins that were keeping me tied up in emotional knots and preventing me from truly connecting with Him as Father, Redeemer, and Friend. He met me with grace, love, and compassion through women He placed in my path to listen to my shame and lift me up in prayer for complete healing.

When I was 35, another break up rocked my world, and I asked Him if I needed to release my hope for marriage and a husband. He taught me through His word that He is my husband (Isaiah 54:5), and He began to help me make sense of a verse that had confused me for years.

At 37, I beckoned to Him again on the question of marriage and a spouse. Was I valuing the wrong things? Did I even understand love and attraction from His perspective? Why did the men I wanted reject me and the ones I didn’t, pursue me? What was He asking of me and for me? He answered by allowing the gentle, unexpected progression of a friendship into a courtship into a proposal into a marriage.

At 39, when my idols of romance and marriage came crashing down into a pile of disappointment and unmet expectations, God met my desperate prayers with yet another gentle reminder that only He can satisfy the deep longing for love my soul desired.

When I was 41, I lost our first child to miscarriage. An unbearable grief enveloped my soul, and I thought I might live the rest of my days in total despair. But He answered my cries with a deep, inner comfort and assurance that He heard me, He saw me, and that I was not alone, even if He never gave us another pregnancy.

At 44, God answered our prayers for a child with a beautiful baby girl who came to us through embryo adoption. The Lord knew, even when I didn’t want to believe it, that I could love beyond measure a child that did not share my DNA.

These are just a few of the major landmarks on my journey to believe God exists, and they are surrounded by thousands more tiny and mid-sized reminders of His love, grace, and mercy in my life. When I asked Him to make Himself known to me, He did. When I had no idea where to turn, He showed me a path. When I doubted, He met me, and grew me, and changed my heart.

Hindsight is 20-20. In the midst of these prayers I felt lost, alone, afraid, worried, angry, desperate, and a myriad of other overwhelming emotions. I was all over the place. And He was there. Steady. Constant. With no shifting shadows. Only a reminder that my present suffering did not compare to the glory that would be revealed in me (Romans 8:18).

I pray you don’t hear that any of this had anything to do with me. It was all Him the whole time. I merely received what He offered as He overflowed my empty, leaky cup with the healing salve of His perfect love.

If prayer is new to you or if you could use some daily encouragement to talk to God, click here to sign up for 30 days of prayer in your inbox. Starting tomorrow morning, I’ll send you one short prayer each day to encourage you in your relationship with Jesus. And then, download the If:Gathering app, here, and join me and women all over the world in exploring topics of faith, starting with the Nicene Creed.

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